'My week of flirting- My week of flirting with women It has now been about one year since my divorce, and during that time, I’ve had varying degrees of luck with online dating. In order to increase my success, I decided to try a different approach. I devoted an entire week to the singular goal of getting a date out in the real world — the old-fashioned way.
My week-long dating experiment recently concluded, and while I am pretty exhausted and my wallet is a little lighter, it was an eye-opening and rather successful experiment.
Here’s how my week went, broken down on a day-by-day basis.
Monday: Gym
On Monday, I actually hit the gym twice (first at 7:30 a.m., then later at 6:30 p.m.) to improve my chances. Either way, it’s a tough nut to crack with so many people listening to digital music players and focusing on their workouts.
In my morning session, I specifically targeted women who I thought would be a good fit for me. I am in shape, but by no means am I a fitness buff. I saw my best opportunity in the free weights section, where a woman approximately in her mid-thirties caught my eye. I struck up a conversation as she completed one of her sets and asked if I could use the weights while she rested. We exchanged a bit of small talk; however, I didn’t sense much return interest, so I simply moved on. I didn’t approach any other women that morning.
In the evening, I attended a co-ed step class, which provided some intense exercise — and also great prospects, as there were only three other guys in the class and 18 women. I couldn’t strike up any conversations until the class finished, though at its conclusion, I had a nice chat with an attractive woman in her forties. Although I didn’t get her phone number, she asked if I would be returning the following week — and her body language was encouraging. I told her I would, so that made the outing a success in my book.
Takeaway lesson: I wouldn’t expect much success when trying to meet women at the gym. The majority of people there are simply focused on their workout. In fact, in a recent Happen magazine survey of nearly 3,000 women, 63% of respondents said the gym was the absolute worst place for men to hit on them. Yikes! But if you’re up for a challenge, keep your approach low-key and don’t come off as though you’re looking for a date — even though you are.
Tuesday: Grocery store
I visited my grocery store around 6 p.m. because I knew it would be filled with after-work shoppers. And since I’m a vegetarian, I picked this section of the store in which to focus my search. Before long, I found a prime target — a single mother who had a small child with her. I picked up some organic pasta and asked her if she’d ever tried it. She said that she had. Bingo! We talked for about 10 minutes, discussing the benefits of organics, and I asked her if she’d like to get a cup of coffee sometime. She said yes. Jackpot! We exchanged phone numbers and met for lunch later that week. It went really well, and we’ve made plans for another date.
Takeaway lesson: Your odds of finding love in the grocery aisles are better than trying to meet someone in the weight room because there’s no loud music to talk over (or other major distractions, like interacting with a personal trainer). Plus, grocery shopping is an activity where women typically won’t be irritated when they’re approached. Just make sure to “shop” during peak hours to improve your chances.
My week-long dating experiment recently concluded, and while I am pretty exhausted and my wallet is a little lighter, it was an eye-opening and rather successful experiment.
Here’s how my week went, broken down on a day-by-day basis.
Monday: Gym
On Monday, I actually hit the gym twice (first at 7:30 a.m., then later at 6:30 p.m.) to improve my chances. Either way, it’s a tough nut to crack with so many people listening to digital music players and focusing on their workouts.
In my morning session, I specifically targeted women who I thought would be a good fit for me. I am in shape, but by no means am I a fitness buff. I saw my best opportunity in the free weights section, where a woman approximately in her mid-thirties caught my eye. I struck up a conversation as she completed one of her sets and asked if I could use the weights while she rested. We exchanged a bit of small talk; however, I didn’t sense much return interest, so I simply moved on. I didn’t approach any other women that morning.
In the evening, I attended a co-ed step class, which provided some intense exercise — and also great prospects, as there were only three other guys in the class and 18 women. I couldn’t strike up any conversations until the class finished, though at its conclusion, I had a nice chat with an attractive woman in her forties. Although I didn’t get her phone number, she asked if I would be returning the following week — and her body language was encouraging. I told her I would, so that made the outing a success in my book.
Takeaway lesson: I wouldn’t expect much success when trying to meet women at the gym. The majority of people there are simply focused on their workout. In fact, in a recent Happen magazine survey of nearly 3,000 women, 63% of respondents said the gym was the absolute worst place for men to hit on them. Yikes! But if you’re up for a challenge, keep your approach low-key and don’t come off as though you’re looking for a date — even though you are.
Tuesday: Grocery store
I visited my grocery store around 6 p.m. because I knew it would be filled with after-work shoppers. And since I’m a vegetarian, I picked this section of the store in which to focus my search. Before long, I found a prime target — a single mother who had a small child with her. I picked up some organic pasta and asked her if she’d ever tried it. She said that she had. Bingo! We talked for about 10 minutes, discussing the benefits of organics, and I asked her if she’d like to get a cup of coffee sometime. She said yes. Jackpot! We exchanged phone numbers and met for lunch later that week. It went really well, and we’ve made plans for another date.
Takeaway lesson: Your odds of finding love in the grocery aisles are better than trying to meet someone in the weight room because there’s no loud music to talk over (or other major distractions, like interacting with a personal trainer). Plus, grocery shopping is an activity where women typically won’t be irritated when they’re approached. Just make sure to “shop” during peak hours to improve your chances.
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